Suits: Thin or Thick?

Everyone has a ‘suit,’ an outer covering that we present to others in order to conceal certain aspects of our true identity. For the vast majority of non-superheroes, these suits are composed of actions and seeming personality traits instead of “fwame wesistant” materials. Some individuals have thicker suits than others. I have met a few friends who seem one way when I first meet them, but as I have more and more one-on-one time with them, I realize that beyond the superficial projections, he or she is someone else completely. I would describe these individuals as having a “thick” suit. For a variety of reasons, the individual chooses not to reveal their true identities to others. Some are afraid of judgment, others are just used to acting a certain way and it becomes routine.
Other individuals have thin suits. They are who they are—meaning they know themselves well and are not hesitant to project to others who they are. When I have one-on-one time with a thin-suited person, the situation has a different feel entirely. I have found that, while of course I can have fun and light-hearted moments with my “thick” suited friends, it takes more effort to find comfort in that type of situation; whereas with my “thin” suited friends, I am almost always at ease.
I feel that spiderman is a thick suited individual. He feels that he must project an image (in this case, heroic and concerned for the welfare of others), yet he actually yearns to do other things—things that would make him personally happier. I find that thick suited individuals often find themselves in situations that aren’t right for them. Usually these situations are gotten into because the individual feels the pressure of outside influences more heavily than a thin suited individual would. Often, it is a lot more difficult for a thick suited individual to make a major change (from spiderman to a racecar driver) than it would be for a thin suited individual (who would be loving what they do already or be in a place that’s easy to discover it).
I feel that when I started high school here, I was a thick suited individual. I found it difficult to “be myself.” Because of this, I think I projected an image that was different from who I really am. Over the years though, I feel I have changed into thin-suited individual, and I am greatly glad I have. There are 2 specific examples that stand out in my mind where a review of my “personality”, by others, was done and the results were different.
One of these instances was in my junior year, attending the JLP training weekend. We did an exercise to find out “how others perceive you.” Each person in the room had an envelope with their name on it. The envelopes were passed around and cards were put inside. Each card had 3 adjectives on it. There were about 30 people in the room and every person had to give 3 adjectives about each other person in the room. Everyone got his or her cards and reviewed them. Mine had many adjectives on there that I wasn’t familiar with. A lot of words showed up that I wouldn’t use to describe my true self at all. Nevertheless, it was an interesting exercise.
The second of these “review” exercises happened about a week ago in my Advanced Acting and Directing Class. An individual sat in the “hot seat” and everyone else in the room wrote down adjectives or phrases that described that particular person. I got my responses back and was surprised at how dead-on everyone was to the way I feel I really am. I thought about the time that had passed between that JLP weekend and now and realized that I think I have become more comfortable with who I am and stopped projecting any fakeness. I still wear a thin suit, but unlike spiderman, I do what I want and am not concerned with color-tv stealers and “gubbners” because that’s not how I want to live my life.