Sunday, September 13, 2009

Suits: Thin or Thick?

Everyone has a ‘suit,’ an outer covering that we present to others in order to conceal certain aspects of our true identity. For the vast majority of non-superheroes, these suits are composed of actions and seeming personality traits instead of “fwame wesistant” materials. Some individuals have thicker suits than others. I have met a few friends who seem one way when I first meet them, but as I have more and more one-on-one time with them, I realize that beyond the superficial projections, he or she is someone else completely. I would describe these individuals as having a “thick” suit. For a variety of reasons, the individual chooses not to reveal their true identities to others. Some are afraid of judgment, others are just used to acting a certain way and it becomes routine.
Other individuals have thin suits. They are who they are—meaning they know themselves well and are not hesitant to project to others who they are. When I have one-on-one time with a thin-suited person, the situation has a different feel entirely. I have found that, while of course I can have fun and light-hearted moments with my “thick” suited friends, it takes more effort to find comfort in that type of situation; whereas with my “thin” suited friends, I am almost always at ease.
I feel that spiderman is a thick suited individual. He feels that he must project an image (in this case, heroic and concerned for the welfare of others), yet he actually yearns to do other things—things that would make him personally happier. I find that thick suited individuals often find themselves in situations that aren’t right for them. Usually these situations are gotten into because the individual feels the pressure of outside influences more heavily than a thin suited individual would. Often, it is a lot more difficult for a thick suited individual to make a major change (from spiderman to a racecar driver) than it would be for a thin suited individual (who would be loving what they do already or be in a place that’s easy to discover it).
I feel that when I started high school here, I was a thick suited individual. I found it difficult to “be myself.” Because of this, I think I projected an image that was different from who I really am. Over the years though, I feel I have changed into thin-suited individual, and I am greatly glad I have. There are 2 specific examples that stand out in my mind where a review of my “personality”, by others, was done and the results were different.
One of these instances was in my junior year, attending the JLP training weekend. We did an exercise to find out “how others perceive you.” Each person in the room had an envelope with their name on it. The envelopes were passed around and cards were put inside. Each card had 3 adjectives on it. There were about 30 people in the room and every person had to give 3 adjectives about each other person in the room. Everyone got his or her cards and reviewed them. Mine had many adjectives on there that I wasn’t familiar with. A lot of words showed up that I wouldn’t use to describe my true self at all. Nevertheless, it was an interesting exercise.
The second of these “review” exercises happened about a week ago in my Advanced Acting and Directing Class. An individual sat in the “hot seat” and everyone else in the room wrote down adjectives or phrases that described that particular person. I got my responses back and was surprised at how dead-on everyone was to the way I feel I really am. I thought about the time that had passed between that JLP weekend and now and realized that I think I have become more comfortable with who I am and stopped projecting any fakeness. I still wear a thin suit, but unlike spiderman, I do what I want and am not concerned with color-tv stealers and “gubbners” because that’s not how I want to live my life.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Reviewing the Contents of my Personal Bookshelf

In an effort to be more frugal, to take better care of my belongings, and getting organized for my eventual college departure I have been trying to clear out the "clutter" in my room. I started this weekend and did a major cleaning of my bathroom (my mom was so proud) and started going through all my books. I realized that almost half of my personal collection could be given away and I wouldn't miss it (that will be going to Goodwill).

The books in this first group included birthday or christmas present books that I ended up not caring for and required reading for some of my middle school and pcds high school classes that I didn't care for.

The second group though was what really got me thinking. These books are ones that I feel have brought valuable insight and knowledge into my life. Many of the books that were on my most memorable list I am keeping. These are books I want to lend to my brother to read one day in hopes that he will enjoy them as much as I did. Other books in the second group are gifts or purchases that I have not yet read, but plan to someday. Some of these titles: The Color Purple, A Room With A View, A Midsummer Nights Dream, Sophie's Choice, Into the Wild, Essential Neruda, and the Elements of Style.

I realized that each of these titles on my shelf now have taught me a lesson I deem valuable: whether it be to always explore garage sales (Dogs of Babel) or to not care about what others think of your big pink house (Secret Life of Bees). Kind of a fun way to spend musing my Labor Day Weekend :)

Antigone: Both Must Bend or Both Will Break

In Sophacles’ classic tragedy Antigone, two different approaches to injustice are shown: one in the play’s protagonist Antigone, and one in her fiancĂ© Haemon. The play beings with Antigone’s declaration to her sister Ismene that she will not only break Creon’s law, but also do so openly and defiantly. She does so, earning her the death penalty for her crime. Her fiancĂ©, Haemon, in an attempt to do what is right, attempts to use his gift of reason to negotiate and try to come to a peaceful conclusion. Antigone displays not only conflict between Antigone and Creon, but also juxtaposition between what it means to bend and what it means to break.

Peaceful moderation efforts like Haemon’s in Antigone have been historically proven in some cases to work. The Greeks in the time of Sophacles surely related to Haemon’s plea for sense; Haemon explains to his father, “the gods endow a man with reason” (37). Haemon’s plea falls to deaf ears though, for his father is unwilling to hear the will of people of Thebes and “bend” (38). When the opposing party (i.e. Creon) is flexible, peaceful moderation efforts become possible and are often successful. A contemporary example being the successful efforts of the leaders of United States and the Soviet Union during the 80’s and 90’s to resolve the conflicts of the Cold War. When both parties are willing to bend, no one has to break. But when one refuses to bend, then one or both will break. In Antigone, Haemon’s efforts to bring peaceful resolution are lost to the inflexibilities of Antigone and Creon. Emotions become high powered and overwhelm reason—a contemporary example of this situation being China’s control over Tibet. The Chinese unquenchable thirst for power and absolute refusal to allow the traditionally peaceful Tibetans to practice their religion and culture. The previous rightful leader of Tibet, the Dalai Lama, has traveled the world with his message of peace and moderation. He has, on numerous occasions, attempted to negotiate with the Chinese government to restore the Tibetan way of life. Like Haemon, many activists for Tibetan peace are looking out for the interests of both parties. Peacemakers have tried to offer to keep China in control of foreign affairs of Tibet, but allow Tibetans to control domestic ones. China, like both Creon and Antigone, has shown itself to be unbendable on this issue, and because of that unbendalbility, Tibet is breaking.

In the story of Antigone, both parties, instead of bending, break apart. Although Antigone’s stance is right, it almost doesn’t matter. I feel her unwillingness to bend as a sign of pride. Unlike Haemon or Ismene, she never went to Creon herself to express that his law was undermining the gods. She decided that it would be a battle when it didn’t have to be. Creon is equally wrong in his inflexibility. He listens to neither his son nor the leader of the chorus. Thus, because neither bends, both break. Antigone is a tragedy because of just that.